For those of you that have followed me over the years, you may have read this resolution from me before today. However, I do that feel that I was this determined back then.
In the past I was curious, …… if my body changed…would my art? This is still interesting to me. However, now I don’t give a damn how it may change my art. Although, I would like to think that I will be happier and therefore my art work will most likely improve.
I have fears, as do many. One of my big fears is of losing weight. Don’t get me wrong, I have legitimate weight to lose (actually more than I thought).
– What if we find a major health issue after I have lost the weight. Will I find a lump that has been hiding? My Dad passed away from cancer at the age of 48 (although he was skinny then and it started out as skin cancer).
– Will I look ‘old’. I am currently 43 and many people always say they are shocked and that they thought I was in my late 20’s. Thanks, but I may end up with horrible saggy wrinkles after this life changing adventure…. then again, maybe not.
– What if I turn out not to be the funky fun’n’sexy image that I have perceived myself of these last 15 + years?
I know these are mostly very silly, but in all honesty, they have actually kept me from trying as hard as I can to lose this baggage of fat. According to my W.W. weigh in this morning, I have a lovely 87.4 lbs to lose… at the minimum to have a healthy BMI.
So, ….. I have completely had enough! I want to look good, I want to feel good, and dammit I want to be considered sexy!
This morning when I went to my first weight watchers meeting in about 15 years and they weighed me in, I actually weighed in 20lbs more that what I had thought I was (judging by the last time I weighed myself in at home a few months ago).
I will not give myself a time line or an event to work towards, as this has also helped de-rail me in the past. This will be an adventure. A lifetime adventure. One I am sure I will have a HUGE love/hate relationship with.
- Bob Harper
- My imaginary film crew that is documenting my eating habits
- Duran, my wonderful son and my close family & friend supporting crew
- and ME! I love me, but now I would love to appreciate the physical me as well.
If you are on a similar journey, please feel free to join me by leaving me a comment below my posts.
Here’s to a happy creative ME! Here we GO!